i dont know what it is, but you look good when i havent slept & your clothes are out of place. i'm addicted, but no one ever said this would put me together. you smile in a way that i've yet to aptly describe & i'd like to try something new. but they say old habits die hard, like silence, only not so bad.

its just one of those days where you're setting yourself up & nothing you say is smooth or well rehearsed. its like i'm speaking in glass shards, but not quite as sharp. or dangerous, but i'm not so safe now, & you're not so loud. i believe people are silent for alot of different reasons, yours better be good. but i'm telling you i cant take much more of this, where i say anything & you grin, please just fix your hair or stop speaking in poetry, anything to make this casual.

i've never been so undone but now i'm quoting your songs & thinking about you during movies. & all the roads that lead to you are winding. but are we wasting our time? i can sit for hours thinking i'm inspired, but something so basic, so complicated as a smile, leaves me speechless. is this not our job? to find the words, you said, "& thats when we become poets" but if i cant spell out your smile, what does that make me? in love, or without talent?

i'd like to vote in favor of the former, because i'd rather think that you're just indescribable. or maybe i'm deceiving, but believe me, i tried & drew blanks. maybe there comes a time when you realize words arent everything, because the difference is too noticable. so sing me something, or tell me your latest philosophy, whatever you think will stop my heart enough that i panic. i promise that when you leave here nothing will ever make you feel so alive again, sorry kid, but thats just how i do. i never said i wanted this romeo & juliet class act romance. i wanted to fall in love & wait for the apocolapse because anything else would be lacking. you have changed everything, but more importantly, nothing, & i thought you should know.

before & after